Wednesday, February 25, 2009
I have done it AGAIN!!!!
This photo editing is FUN STUFF!! I got called in to work so I had 8 hours to devote to photo editing!! Here is my newest creation. This was made for my favorite mother in law and best friend, Anne.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
I DID IT!!!!!
I have recently gotten really interested in photo editing (thanks to MIL) so I finally tried to do something myself instead of having other people do it for me. I found a really neat program online and I HAD to share my first piece of work. It's pretty simple, but I am proud of it. So, here it is!!!
Major Turn Around
OK, so yesterday I was blogging about being depressed and today, I am SUPER HAPPY!!! Sometimes I wonder about myself. LOL
I came in from work this morning around 5:30 and Drew asked me to snuggle with him for a while in his chair. I guess this just made my day!! I layed with him for a little while and couldn't quite get comfortable (2 people are not meant to sleep together in a recliner!!) so he tells me to go get in the bed and get some sleep. I did just that. I slept until 3 pm!! I didn't hear him tell me he was leaving for work or anything. I was OUT.
So when I got up, he calls and tells me he needs me to pick him up from work. ME?? You actually want ME to pick you up from work? OK!! This gets me super excited that he actually asked me to pick him up instead of asking his mom or dad. He NEVER asks me to do this kind of stuff for him. NEVER!! So all day I am ancy about going to get my man from work. I am talking, running through the house and singing and dancing, ancy. HA! I am sure you are picturing me running through the house and I am sure the cars driving by thought I was NUTS! Anyway he calls later and tells me I have to pick him up in Gould, which is like 45 minutes away. OK, I can do that too. When the time finally comes to go get him I FLY out the door. He told me how to get there, but if you know me, I am not the best at remembering the small details. I made it to Dumas with no problem. I go through there every time I go to KY, which in the past year has been a TON of trips to KY!! So I go through the red lights and to the Exxon station he told me about. I see the sign that says "Douglas" which is where he told me to turn. He told me to go down until I see an old car in the driveway and him in the shop. So I am driving down this road looking for an old car and a shop. Hmmmm, every where I look is old cars and it seems I am in the GHETTO!!! There were black folks walking the streets (this was after dark) and hollering as I drove (about 20 miles an hour) down the road. I tried calling him to see if I was heading in the right direction and of course he doesn't answer his phone!! So I say to myself "I'll go a little further to see if maybe I haven't gone far enough". HA I reach the end of the road. Not talking a dead end sign or anything. Its just road and then FIELD! What is up with that?! So I attempt to turn around (there are no driveways at this point) and end up in the ditch!! Oh crap!! And let me just mention here I am rolling on a donut!! HA! I was so afraid the black folks were gonna stop me, the little white girl in a mustang, and steal my donut, rape and murder me, and well I had many other things going through my head. So I finally get turned around and get the heck out of dodge!! I make it back to the main road and call him again. NO ANSWER. I texted him and told him to call me. So he FINALLY calls back and tells me I was supposed to take the 2ND road. OK. I turn on the next road, drive what seems FOREVER and FINALLY find him!! He hands me a drink and we pull out. I thought I would be so MAD by the time I got to him, but when he saw me and smiled, that was it!! All the anger and bad thoughts went away. We actually talked, sang and laughed all the way home. It's amazing how his smile can make my anger disappear! And he uses it to his advantage too. He makes me super happy. Now yesterday doesn't seem so bad. A wise woman once told me "Tomorrow will look better than today" and she was right. It always seems to work out that way for me. Who knew all it would take to turn me around was for my man to ask me to come get him from work!!
I came in from work this morning around 5:30 and Drew asked me to snuggle with him for a while in his chair. I guess this just made my day!! I layed with him for a little while and couldn't quite get comfortable (2 people are not meant to sleep together in a recliner!!) so he tells me to go get in the bed and get some sleep. I did just that. I slept until 3 pm!! I didn't hear him tell me he was leaving for work or anything. I was OUT.
So when I got up, he calls and tells me he needs me to pick him up from work. ME?? You actually want ME to pick you up from work? OK!! This gets me super excited that he actually asked me to pick him up instead of asking his mom or dad. He NEVER asks me to do this kind of stuff for him. NEVER!! So all day I am ancy about going to get my man from work. I am talking, running through the house and singing and dancing, ancy. HA! I am sure you are picturing me running through the house and I am sure the cars driving by thought I was NUTS! Anyway he calls later and tells me I have to pick him up in Gould, which is like 45 minutes away. OK, I can do that too. When the time finally comes to go get him I FLY out the door. He told me how to get there, but if you know me, I am not the best at remembering the small details. I made it to Dumas with no problem. I go through there every time I go to KY, which in the past year has been a TON of trips to KY!! So I go through the red lights and to the Exxon station he told me about. I see the sign that says "Douglas" which is where he told me to turn. He told me to go down until I see an old car in the driveway and him in the shop. So I am driving down this road looking for an old car and a shop. Hmmmm, every where I look is old cars and it seems I am in the GHETTO!!! There were black folks walking the streets (this was after dark) and hollering as I drove (about 20 miles an hour) down the road. I tried calling him to see if I was heading in the right direction and of course he doesn't answer his phone!! So I say to myself "I'll go a little further to see if maybe I haven't gone far enough". HA I reach the end of the road. Not talking a dead end sign or anything. Its just road and then FIELD! What is up with that?! So I attempt to turn around (there are no driveways at this point) and end up in the ditch!! Oh crap!! And let me just mention here I am rolling on a donut!! HA! I was so afraid the black folks were gonna stop me, the little white girl in a mustang, and steal my donut, rape and murder me, and well I had many other things going through my head. So I finally get turned around and get the heck out of dodge!! I make it back to the main road and call him again. NO ANSWER. I texted him and told him to call me. So he FINALLY calls back and tells me I was supposed to take the 2ND road. OK. I turn on the next road, drive what seems FOREVER and FINALLY find him!! He hands me a drink and we pull out. I thought I would be so MAD by the time I got to him, but when he saw me and smiled, that was it!! All the anger and bad thoughts went away. We actually talked, sang and laughed all the way home. It's amazing how his smile can make my anger disappear! And he uses it to his advantage too. He makes me super happy. Now yesterday doesn't seem so bad. A wise woman once told me "Tomorrow will look better than today" and she was right. It always seems to work out that way for me. Who knew all it would take to turn me around was for my man to ask me to come get him from work!!
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Depression
Its back!! Sometimes I wonder if I will ever just be a happy person. Just when I think I can't be any happier, I hit these low spots. I am not talking just a few hours, it always ends up being DAYS that I just don't want to do anything or talk to anyone. I just want to crawl up in a hole and cry for hours and hours! It is really putting a toll on my relationship with Drew. I always end up taking it out on him and then we aren't "normal" for the next week or so. I don't know how to fix it. I want to be the best girlfriend I can be to him, but it's like it is not in me to do so. Is this possible? I don't want to cause him unhappiness. Should I let him go? I am not sure I could do that. I love him too much. I have tried to let him go several times and always end up right back where I started. Leaving is not the answer to my problems, but is it the answer to his happiness? I have no doubt he loves me, but does he love me enough to stick through my depression times? He has said before depression is all in my head. I think this is why I can't talk to him when I get depressed. He doesn't understand what it is like!! He is suppposed to be my best friend but yet I can't talk to him about my biggest problem. Is this a healthy relationship? Will it last a lifetime? I don't know the answer to this. I may not EVER know the answer to this. All I know is that I DO love him with all of my heart and I will just have to pray that God can help me overcome this.
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